About Time (2013)

  Time travel plus Rachel McAdams' smile, where do I sign!?   Luckily for me I didn't have to sign anywhere I just had to press play. Which was a relief seeing as since I have an ugly signature and even uglier credit; I probably would've gotten denied. What am I talking about? I don't know, I hardly...

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Nebraska (2013)

  Wait a second... this isn't the Michael Jackson video where him and Janet are in space is it?   It has been a while since I have seen anything in good ol' black and white.   I heard that they went against the studio to release it sans color, and I'm very happy they did. The film is good....

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Lego Movie (2014)

"Everything is awesome" this movie included!   Lego Movie has the emotion of an adult with the humor of a child. Which pretty sums my entire life up with one sentence. No wonder I liked it so much. So come for the Legos and stay for the life lessons kiddies.   This film is quite the potluck. It...

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Oldboy (2013)

  I wonder if I could pay Spike Lee to come to my house to shit on all the other things I love?   In case you were unable to decode that cryptic intro, I hated this remake with a passion. A passion so fierce it could only be rivaled by Romeo & Juliet on extacy!   When I first heard that...

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Rush (2013)

  I am going to do my best to not RACE through this one, because you can't RUSH perfection.   Mother of god! Did that just come from me? If you see me walking down the street please kick me square in the dick. In my defense I have been up for 36 hours so I can't imagine I could do any better.  ...

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Gravity (2013)

  Gravity does have enough pull.   Okay that's it I promise. No more puns or space references. I think I've used enough lately.   This film visually is pretty breathtaking. I am kicking myself for not seeing it in theaters. Is it the second coming that everyone acts like it is? To me, no....

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In A World... (2013)

   Girl power movie, thumbs up! Comedians being serious, in the words of a great man "I wish I had more hands so I could give those titties four thumbs down!"   Seriously though I knew something was up the second I saw Nick Offerman without a mustache. If that isn't a red flag I don't know...

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Blue Jasmine (2013)

  Dear Allan Stewart Konigsberg, GO FUCK YOURSELF!  That's what a tiny part of me wants to say. But my sensible half reminds me that it is just a movie and commends you Mr. Allen on a well made film. Plus I think the media is giving you enough shit so I'll take it easy. You're welcome.  ...

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Her (2013)

Yes! Trailer IMDB   ...

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The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013)

  I fucking loved this movie!   How's that for an attention grabbing opener that let's the reader know how you feel. Suck it 9th grade English teacher that hated all my essays!   To be painfully honest it's really hard for me to watch this series , or anything with Jennifer Lawrence really...

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American Hustle (2013)

  I saw this film in theaters a couple weeks ago and I'm still unsure what the fuck I was supposed to feel! "Oooh you said a bad word, I'm telling." Go ahead you little Narc. lol what the hell is wrong with me? Moving on....   My sister and father insisted on seeing this movie. And fearing further...

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A.C.O.D. (2013)

Be honest, have you ever once done a puzzle and not jammed the pieces together and told yourself they fit? If you answered no congratulations, you're a liar.   As I oh so wittily metaphorically foreshadowed, that is how I feel about this movie. One with an ultimate result that is distinguishable but not...

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All Is Lost (2013)

  I liked it better when it was Life of Pi and not life of some guy!    Just kidding Sundance, I couldn't help it given the obvious similarities. The main one being they are both great movies. Another feature that rings for both bells is the debate that sparks after watching them. But with...

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Bad Grandpa (2013)

Grandpa is fine, it's this movie that is bad!   I think I am getting old because I don't think I enjoy Jackass stuff anymore. Which is crazy because some of the best times of my life were when I was younger and my friends and I made homage-esque videos.   Most of our cinematic adventures went like...

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Enough Said (2013)

A sweet sendoff to a giant of the acting world. No I'm not making a fat joke (even though there are plenty in the movie). To be serious for a moment, I am saddened by his passing. But I find joy in the fact that he went out on a positive note.   The actor is James Gandolfini and the note is Enough Said.  ...

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